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12/10/2017

Gathering at me friend Sam's house last night. Sis Susie wanted to come which would have been dead embarrassing, but mum wouldn't let her anyhow. Sam's after Sophie whose a new girl in our class and high in the 'shape' section. Last night Sam reeked of so much Lynx to hide his body odour that it was difficult to breath near him. Reckon that kind of stink is fine for da flowers but not for us 'uman mans. Still - seemed to work O.K 'cos he was snogging Sophie like he was trying to get into the Guinness book of records to beat some bloke called Alfred Wolfson who kissed 8000 people in 8 hours on 15th Sept 1990 which is 'bout one person every 3.6 seconds by me calculator!